They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
