Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
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