PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
