Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
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