Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
