So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Randomize
