I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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