i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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