there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
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