yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
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After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
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the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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