Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
