Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I wish I only lived at night.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize