your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
