whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
