Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Randomize
