bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
