It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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