I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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