I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
