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so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
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