Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.