my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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