so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
i need some magic done to my vagina
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
