areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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