Pappa wants mamma naked
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
He better not be in your backpack
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
