i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize
