Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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