ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
