That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
