just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize