Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
