everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I will pee on everything he values.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
