Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
