He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill