Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I just forgot I was standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize