I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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