You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
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