not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
just tell him i said nine months
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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