Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock

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  (970): We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard (970): I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock http://tfl.nu/uy52
  Replies (52) Good night (628) Bad night (2294)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.

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  (574): god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut. http://tfl.nu/n8g7
  Replies (34) Good night (1032) Bad night (3846)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.

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  (604): Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating. http://tfl.nu/sjit
  Replies (35) Good night (13709) Bad night (1154)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.

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  (717): We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation. http://tfl.nu/p6jv
  Replies (43) Good night (1326) Bad night (4582)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered

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  (+44): Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered http://tfl.nu/4p47
  Replies (9) Good night (712) Bad night (4059)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?

  (818): View more from California

  I hate you.

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  (661): So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night? (818): I hate you. http://tfl.nu/ps95
  Replies (9) Good night (5100) Bad night (997)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Well now I have my semen on her headphones

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  (203): Well now I have my semen on her headphones http://tfl.nu/hho2
  Replies (7) Good night (2390) Bad night (2027)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.

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  (801): He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me. http://tfl.nu/9uhs
  Replies (33) Good night (6166) Bad night (1773)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.

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  (419): Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation. http://tfl.nu/zsht
  Replies (2) Good night (1961) Bad night (590)
• Favorite

  (435): View more from Utah

  Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line

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  (435): Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line http://tfl.nu/ol2d
  Replies (2) Good night (701) Bad night (1558)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.

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  (770): Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers. (504): A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome. http://tfl.nu/wa4b
  Replies (4) Good night (2224) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.

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  (972): I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards. http://tfl.nu/fq92
  Replies (8) Good night (1724) Bad night (592)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.

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  (818): Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest. http://tfl.nu/joqb
  Replies (9) Good night (1368) Bad night (472)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.

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  (818): Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream. http://tfl.nu/75x9
  Replies (3) Good night (1139) Bad night (337)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.

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  (310): Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts. http://tfl.nu/j0t2
  Replies (2) Good night (558) Bad night (312)

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