god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize