This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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