Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
