You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
