I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
