I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
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