just come out here and I will go home with you...
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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