The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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