I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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