I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
