He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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