Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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