She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
